Getting Stronger
by AniDragon aka Riona-chan
Summary: Samus ponders her reaction to Ridley in Other M, and vows to never let herself be affected like that again.


_(A/N: Samus freezing up against Ridley in Other M seems to be a subject of much complaint among Metroid fans. I admit, I wasn't crazy about it either, but I wanted to make it work. So, here are my theories on why Samus froze up, and her reactions after the fact.)_

**Getting Stronger**

**By: AniDragon, aka Riona-chan**

_Why?_ Was the only question on Samus's mind, almost a week after the events on the bottle ship. _Why did I freeze up?_

She sighed as she glanced out the window at the city beyond her. Ridley had only once had that effect on her, that time on Zebes. But that had been her first time facing him since the death of her parents. But after that, she'd been fine. He always brought back painful memories, of course. It was never _pleasant _to fight him, but since then, she'd never actually frozen up before. What had made this fight so different?

_Am I just getting weak?_

"What's wrong, princess?" A friendly voice broke her out of her thoughts, and she glanced over to Anthony Higgs, who's apartment she was currently visiting. She'd zoned out and gotten contemplative while he'd been at the bathroom.

"Nothing," She answered, "Just thinking."

"About?" He pressed, leaning against the window next to her.

"_Nothing_," She insisted. Cursed persistent friends.

"Alright, fine," He shrugged, putting his hands up defensively, "You don't _have_ to tell me... But if something's bothering you, you shouldn't keep it bottled up, you know? It's not good for you."

"What makes you so sure something's bothering me?" She countered.

"Well..." He glanced out the window, "I know you aren't in the army anymore... But you and Commander Malkovich were close, weren't you? It's normal that you'd miss him."

"I wasn't thinking about him," She replied dryly. _Or at least, I wasn't until you mentioned him_, "I do miss him... I wish I could have been the one to eliminate the Metroids in his place... But that's not what's bothering me right now."

"So something_ is_ bothering you!" Anthony smirked triumphantly.

She glared at him, but he didn't even flinch, only crossed his arms and leaned against the window again, holding her gaze.

She sighed and turned away from him, "Fine, you win," She shook her head and then muttered: "Never could beat you in a staring contest..."

_Maybe talking about it _will _help..._

"It's Ridley," She told him, "I froze up when I saw him... I haven't done that since the first time I've had to fight him."

She heard him shift behind her, "Ridley's a pretty nasty piece of work. After everything he's done to you, it's only normal that you'd be afraid of him."

"I'm not _afraid_ of him," She shook her head and turned back to him, "That's just the thing. I _know_ I can beat him. I've beaten him before. I'll do it again tomorrow if I have to. He always brings back bad memories, but those memories _never _interfered with my fighting ability before. What was _so_ different on the bottle ship that made me freeze up like an inexperienced rookie?"

Anthony frowned, apparently thinking the question over. Finally, he shrugged, "Well... He _did_ have the element of surprise."

She rolled her eyes, "As much of an advantage as that does give him, it's hardly an excuse."

He shook his head, "I don't just mean tactically... Look, correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems like every other time you fought Ridley, you'd come across some Space Pirates beforehand, right?"

"Well, yeah," She shrugged, "Of course; he's their leader."

"Exactly," He said, "Being around Space Pirates, you probably expected their leader, Ridley, to show up eventually. Even if you'd killed him before, you know the Space Pirates have the technology to clone him. You always had time to mentally brace yourself to the possibility before you actually came across him. On the bottle ship... Well, there might have been Zebesians there, but the Space Pirates as an organisation weren't. I imagine that Ridley was the _last_ thing you expected to come across. You didn't have time to brace yourself for the emotional impact he has on you."

Now she crossed her arms as she thought on his words. It was true that the Space Pirates had always alerted her to Ridley's presence before... But was she really so weak that being caught off guard—whether it was emotionally, mentally, physically, or tactically, it didn't matter—would cause such a reaction in her?

She thought back to that first time she'd faced Ridley... Old Bird had said she'd had an episode of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. But then... she'd gotten over it, hadn't she? And she managed to defeat Ridley not only that time, but time and time again afterwards.

"That's a stupid reason," She finally concluded, "I should be stronger than that. With all the training that I've had, something as simple as surprise shouldn't have so much of an effect on me... Not anymore..."

"Good training isn't infallible..." He put a hand on her shoulder, "And to be frank, neither are you, princess, despite how you might like to think. Trauma can do some nasty things to your mind, even long after you might think you're over it."

"Regardless, the conclusion is still the same," She glanced up and met his eyes, her expression neutral, "I'm too weak."

"No you're not..." He started.

"Don't sugar coat this, Anthony," She demanded, pulling away from his hand on her shoulder, "If Ridley still has a chance of affecting me, of triggering this stupid Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, then that means that I need to find a way to overcome it for good."

He winced, "That's... not always possible, you know..."

"I have to try," She shook her head, "I can't allow myself to ever react that way again. If you recall, it almost got you killed."

"Almost being the key word," He told her, "But fine. You realise this is going to mean therapy, right?"

"I don't like it, but..." She sighed, "If it's my only option, then I'll do it."

Anthony smiled, "In that case, you're far from weak."

"Flatterer," She punched his shoulder gently, breaking herself out of her funk, "You give me too much credit."

He made a show of being hurt by the punch, knowing she wouldn't buy it. All the while, he replied to her comment in his mind, _I really don't, princess. You're amazing._

**~End~ **


End file.
